'Toon Trauma - She found her roots, and they were blonde...
By Jill Christine Carpenter
It's been mentioned to me a time or two that I tend to treat my little drawings and doodles like they are real. That's just silly, of course, because I certainly know that these little 'toon people and various critters are merely ink and paint, or pixels on a computer screen, and aren't real at all.
The problem is that THEY don't know that they aren't real, and I've never had the heart to tell them. However, it has occurred to me that if I died, it's very likely that they'd find themselves in the care of folks that might not believe in mollycoddling 'toons. So, I decided to sit the little Jillster 'toon down and tell her about her history before she hears it from strangers. She's been with me the longest and I felt she had a right to know.
When I told her that she was a 'toon and not a real person, she gasped in shock. I explained that her father was actually a Speedball pen holder with a crow quill tip, her mother was a Kolinsky Russian Squirrel watercolor brush, and that she was born on a small sheet of 140lb Arches cold press watercolor paper. She screamed at me that I was just telling lies ('toons can be sooo overly dramatic sometimes). It was quite upsetting.
So, I showed her the Kolinsky brush and that the golden hair color was the same as hers. Then dug out the old crow quill pen, dipped it in the ink bottle and drew some lines...they matched her lines. She was seriously peeved and couldn't seem to get over the shock.
I told her that being a 'toon wasn't necessarily a bad thing and explained about comic books, and Garfield and Calvin & Hobbs, and Charlie Brown, trying to make her feel better about her 'toonliness. She then threatened to join the 'Toon Union (Local 106) and go on strike. Even talked about getting a lawyer.
So, I showed her the paper shredder. She's quiet now. Sulking, but quiet.
I'm sure glad 'toons aren't real, otherwise life could be difficult around here.
Now I should probably explain to my computer mouse that it really isn't Mickey's cousin...but then again, maybe I should leave well enough alone.
It's been mentioned to me a time or two that I tend to treat my little drawings and doodles like they are real. That's just silly, of course, because I certainly know that these little 'toon people and various critters are merely ink and paint, or pixels on a computer screen, and aren't real at all.
The problem is that THEY don't know that they aren't real, and I've never had the heart to tell them. However, it has occurred to me that if I died, it's very likely that they'd find themselves in the care of folks that might not believe in mollycoddling 'toons. So, I decided to sit the little Jillster 'toon down and tell her about her history before she hears it from strangers. She's been with me the longest and I felt she had a right to know.
When I told her that she was a 'toon and not a real person, she gasped in shock. I explained that her father was actually a Speedball pen holder with a crow quill tip, her mother was a Kolinsky Russian Squirrel watercolor brush, and that she was born on a small sheet of 140lb Arches cold press watercolor paper. She screamed at me that I was just telling lies ('toons can be sooo overly dramatic sometimes). It was quite upsetting.
So, I showed her the Kolinsky brush and that the golden hair color was the same as hers. Then dug out the old crow quill pen, dipped it in the ink bottle and drew some lines...they matched her lines. She was seriously peeved and couldn't seem to get over the shock.
I told her that being a 'toon wasn't necessarily a bad thing and explained about comic books, and Garfield and Calvin & Hobbs, and Charlie Brown, trying to make her feel better about her 'toonliness. She then threatened to join the 'Toon Union (Local 106) and go on strike. Even talked about getting a lawyer.
So, I showed her the paper shredder. She's quiet now. Sulking, but quiet.
I'm sure glad 'toons aren't real, otherwise life could be difficult around here.
Now I should probably explain to my computer mouse that it really isn't Mickey's cousin...but then again, maybe I should leave well enough alone.
posted by James at 3:53 PM
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